You always know where to find me.

I knew this would happen. I knew it would hit me just when I was happy. It couldn't leave me alone. I can barely look after myself right now, let alone anything else. I don't want to hurt anyone, I just need to think. Do I save everyone else from the pain, or do I protect myself? I can't do this by myself but I can't ask anyone else to take this on too. All I know is that I can't do what I use to, that is not an option, I am finally doing what I want to do, they trust me again. So I will deal with this. No one else that knows how this works is stable enough to help me. So I will help myself. I didn't go once last year and I will not go once this year. I am strong enough to beat this and I will. I'm not asking you to wait for me, you deserve to be happy. Just do whatever it is that makes you happy, Lord knows I'm trying.