You're 21.

It's three days until I enter the world by myself. I was expecting to at least have him to hold my hand as stupid as it sounds. Big changes are coming and I don't know if I'm ready for them. I thought with him there they would be easier, that I was going to be happy. He's not here anymore, I don't want him to be either but I miss him. I miss him a lot. I'm not sure why things ended the way they did, I don't know why he doesn't want me anymore but I do know one thing. My life is coming and I need to accept that I am on my own. Of all the things that I was scared about, being alone wasn't one of them, it is now and I don't think it's going to go away. I don't want anyone but him but I also don't want the hurt. So it's just me, I guess this is what being a grown up is all about.